How to patch up after a fight; Relationship advice

Relationships are not only made up of laughter and happiness, there will be tough times where you may get hurt and disappointed. It’s all part of the game, even fights. You cannot find a relationship where the couples don’t fight. Fights are born when there is a difference in opinions. Logically thinking, every individual is unique in their thoughts and perspective. When two people come together in a relationship, it is also the combination of different thoughts and opinions. So it is obvious that there will be a clash. But when you start accepting your partner and their thoughts you will end up in a beautiful relationship.

Accept your mistakes in relationship

Most of us don’t know how to deal with the after-fight situation. We must deal with the situation in a mature way. If you are wrong, you must show courage for accepting your mistakes and apologize for the wrongdoing. Have an open conversation and try to be a good listener. When you are trying to overcome the fight, always give your partner positive attention. Be willing to change for the benefit of your relationship.

Never hold on to a fight for long. Avoid keeping grudges and never continue the fight on a new day. Starting the day with a fight can make you and your partner dull. Sit together and mutually agree to make up such that both start healing. Accept the fact that you were also a part of the fight. Never put all the blame on your partner. Be humble and realize where it went wrong. Never use the words “but”, “you should have” while patching up.

Talk to your partner

If you are still angry about the fight, take a break before talking to your partner. Let the anger cool and make sure you are in control. Practice deep breathing if things are going out of hand. If you have the habit of writing journals, then it can help you to let go of the frustration. More than your anger and more than the competition to beat your partner, place your relationship in the first place. Instead of proving that you are right, try to understand your partner’s perspective. Before everything splits apart, give more importance to your relationship than your ego. Understand that you are not playing any game as opponents, you both are in the same team and you should both work together to find a solution.

If you are wrong, admit it and apologize. Express your understanding and regret for doing that. Empathize your partner’s feelings and emotions. Get to know how the fight has impacted them. If they were wrong, have the mind to forgive them. Holding on to grudges will not take you anywhere. Open up and tell your partner that you don’t want to harbor negative feelings. Forgiving doesn’t mean that you accept all your partner’s actions. It is one of the effective ways to loosen your negative emotions and head for a new beginning. It is not an easy process, it takes time.

Give them the space inside the relationship

If required, take some space. A little space between both can help to clear your head and calm down. Before deciding to stay apart, agree to meet up or speak within a few days such that the conflict doesn’t linger on. During the patching-up process, it is important not to start the fight all over again. Never start with a blaming sentence. Set the boundaries in such a way that both keep the conversation positive and moving forward.

Listen to your partner with an open heart. Once you are going to discuss a fight, make sure you are listening to them rather than just ‘hearing’. Instead of making defensive comments, shift your priority to understanding your partner. Avoid interrupting and give your full attention.

Fights are common, some patches up fast while some take time. At the end of the day, you will be happy with your partner! Good day.

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